Give it a label
Posted on May 22, 2008
At a recent event I heard the speaker say: “What you don’t own and label, owns you. You have to own it and label it to let it go.” This statement resonated with me and I wondered how many other people in the audience really understood the significance of this simple realization.
I’ve been in a place where I didn’t “own” that something was wrong with me and I didn’t give it the appropriate label. In turn, I allowed emotions to consume me that impacted my ability to be happy. I let my life spiral into a negative abyss which almost lead to me divorcing my husband. Then one day a psychic told me that I would be divorced within 2 years. She gave my marital status a label – divorce. Whoa!
Even though I had been having thoughts of divorce and had said the word in my head, her label of my life hit me like a ton of bricks. It forced me to think about my marriage, my life, and myself. Did I really want a divorce? Not really, but there had been times where I really didn’t like my husband. Although, there were times when I loved him more than anything. Was he a bad husband? No, truly he was a saint for putting up with me during my worst-of-times.
I formed two questions that changed my life – What can I do to be happy again? What can I do to save my marriage?
I finally admitted I was depressed. It didn’t matter if it was labeled postpartum or PTSD, it finally had a label and I could own it. With that label I was able to create an action plan. I sought help with anti-depressants and with alternative counseling therapies. I realized that I wanted to change. I wanted to be happy again. And I wanted to have a happy marriage with my husband too.
Every now and then I hear people caution us to use labels – yesterday, as a matter of fact. To some extent I agree with them, but I also think labels help us to overcome our challenges. I’m an introvert and since I know this about myself, I’ve learned how to manage my personality in social situations.
What are you not labeling? Are you going to own it so that you can let it go?
Creative Commons image courtesy of bitsandbobbins
» Filed Under Marriage, Personal Growth
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3 Responses to “Give it a label”
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I love that “labeling” theory – it really makes sense!
Visiting from NaCommLeavMo:
Although I agree in most cases, I sometimes think we stick ourselves with labels and then have trouble shaking that label. I am more than “the woman who miscarried”, but sometimes it is hard to think of myself as anything other than that. I do have a son now so that has changed some, but at first that was the only way I could think of myself.
Love this idea! I try and do this whenever… but sometimes I lack…
Happy Friday!
(nclm)