Twin Peas Podcast (Episode 21): Do You Resent Your Partner?
Posted on February 19, 2009
Infertility is often misunderstood. Many people who don’t know much about the medical issues that cause infertility often assume that it is a woman’s issue. While it is true that women are the one who have to deal with the hormone injections and manage the side effects of the medications from fertility treatments, it is in fact, a couple’s issue.
As I sat across from a woman who was just entering her second trimester after IVF with donor eggs, I became even more aware that infertility is a couple’s medical problem. I was intrigued as she described the resentment she felt toward her husband because she had to endure the needles and medications while he just waited patiently to play his part. Their infertility was mainly due to female factor although there might have been a male component, I don’t recall. Anyway, I felt validated by her honesty.
It’s not that women, at least this is my opinion, regret or blame their parnter for “forcing” them to do IVF (or other fertility treatments). It’s that the physical strain and emotional drain of IVF can become overwhelming even if it was our decision to move forward with the medical interventions. Men simply do not have to experience infertility the same way in which women do. And sometimes this can create a disconnect in the relationship.
So, how do you feel about your partner? Is there anything he can do to make the process better or more pleasant for you? How can you support each other during this stressful time?
» Filed Under Infertility, Marriage
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