A Talk With My Husband On Our IVF Experience (Twin Peas Pod Episode 8)
Posted on May 29, 2008
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Today, I interview my husband, Dave, about our infertility journey. I didn’t provide him with the questions ahead of time so I hope you’ll notice his genuine responses.
I often tease my husband that he is arrogant; he says it’s a matter of confidence, not arrogance. As we discuss his male factor infertility, he never felt his condition made him less of a man even though some of his friends poked fun at him. We opted not to proceed with surgery to see if that would help his male factor issues and instead headed straight for IVF.
He is open about how our marriage was, in his words, “rocky, at best.” In addition, our IVF resulted in twins and he was scared and totally uneducated about the risk factors associated with multiple-gestation pregnancies.
How does a man handle his life and his emotional wife during this time period? As Dave mentions, this is all new territory for both individuals. It can be overwhelming for the man and there is a lot to learn so he recommends educating yourself sooner-rather-than-later to be more prepared for what might happen. His advice? Communicate!
Our marriage is stronger today than it was before our experience with infertility, yet it has changed too. We have learned to communicate with each other more effectively. Hopefully you can learn from our mistakes.
Be sure to leave your comments about this episode, or call our comment line at (206) 203-4138. Who knows, you may even end up on the show!
» Filed Under Infertility, Marriage, Personal Growth, Relationships, communication
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11 Responses to “A Talk With My Husband On Our IVF Experience (Twin Peas Pod Episode 8)”
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I loved hearing a male perspective. Mine is not so confident so he didn’t really let me in too much. And as my husband he was more worried about letting me down than how he was feeling about himself. I had the major issues with PCOS but he had low morphology at about 2%. Congrats on your book. Here from NCLM.
Here from NaComLeavMo. We are also dealing with male factor and it has been very hard for the both of us. Glad to know that other people have made it through successfully.
I love the idea of interviewing your husband about his perspective. Sometimes I am so busy formulating my own opinion, I forget to ask for his!
It sounds like you have worked very hard on making your marriage a good one.
My husband and I have also grown closer as a result of our struggles with infertility. Thanks for sharing your story!
BTW . . . Your girls are gorgeous!!
Hi From NCLM! I love your blog and all the different topics that you touch on. I have actually posted a couple of my husbands thoughts on IM shots and supporting the wife through Surrogacy…it’s great getting him involved….and he appreciates being appreciated!
Hugs
Sharon
I think we do forget about the men. Although they are not as emotional as we are, they are going through it too. Something I had to learn along the way!
Looking forward to reading/hearing more of your blog. We too dealt with male factor, although my husband has not once talked about it with me.
hi I have been here before. I really enjoyed the podcast for 22nd.
We have IVF twins too - unexplained infertility
I’m here from NaComLeavCom
My Little Drummer boys
warm regards
Trish
Katt, So sorry to hear about your husband not opening up to you. I don’t know what is worse, fighting about it all the time (which is what we did) or not talking about it at all. I think I’d take the fighting.
Trish, thanks for returning! I appreciate your comment.
Kelly - I agree, in my world fighting is better then silence. To me, silence is almost louder! I love that you interviewed your hubby - whether you have infertility challenges or not, husbands are often forgotten and left out in the whole pregnancy process.