A Is For Advocacy
Posted on March 16, 2009
When you are faced with a medical crisis the word advocate often takes on new meaning. For me, it was a means of survival. I needed to know everything about infertility; what caused it, how to treat it, who the best doctors were, how much it cost, etc. I spent hours online researching our condition; male factor infertility. I quickly learned that we had limited options to have our own child. I sought out friends who knew people who had used fertility treatments. I was a sponge learning everything I could to help me conquer this disease.
During our very first meeting with the Reproductive Endocrinologist I was able to keep up with the terminology. I didn’t need to ask my questions to gain clarification because I had already educated myself about the procedures. As he learned more about our condition he determined that IVF with ICSI was our best route. Something that I had gathered from my research. My husband was trying to keep up, but I was right there with the doc. It felt empowering!
Once we started our IVF cycle, I wanted to know not only the results of all of our tests, but what the results meant. Sometimes I worried that my doctor or the nurses might find me annoying for all of my questions, but what I found instead was their willingness to educate me, to really help me understand the process/purpose of it.
I have to admit there were times that I didn’t know what a test was for and didn’t know what questions I should be asking. At one point, my husband said, “What’s the point of this exam? Didn’t we do this already?” I tried to answer the best that I could, but at the time I didn’t really know what was so different about a traditional ultrasound and the fluid-u/s. There were so many tests, procedures, medications, etc. that I didn’t always feel the need to know every last detail. Fertility treatments can be overwhelming and sometimes I just had to take a break and just trust the process.
Part of being your own advocate is standing up for what you believe in. With fertility treatments one of the few benefits of self-pay is that you get to choose your doctor. Your insurance plan doesn’t dictate who is availabe for you to use. My husband and I used this opportunity to interview docs and determine which one we liked best. In the end, our choice was made based on which doctor was going to be most aggressive in trying to get us pregnant. Determine what qualities or characters you desire in your doctor. It’s an easy way to start advocating for yourself before you start your treatment.
How has infertility changed your actions as a patient?
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It took me up until about 2 years ago to realize that I needed to advocate for my own health because the doctors certainly weren’t doing it for me.